I used to blame everyone else for my reality. The environment and people around me seemed like the cause of all my problems. But everything changed when I decided to take full responsibility for my situation. I realized my negative self-talk was holding me back, so I started challenging those old patterns.
Guess what happened next? Everything started falling into place! I found my true love, landed a stable job, and began doing what I love—writing this blog. This transformation didn’t happen overnight, but the change was incredible.
By changing the way I talked to myself, I changed my entire life. I went from feeling stuck and hopeless to living a life filled with joy and purpose. In this blog, I want to share how you can do the same. If you talk to yourself the right way, you can get everything you want. Keep reading, and I’ll show you how.
Understanding Self-Talk
Definition of Self-Talk
Self-talk is the internal dialogue that runs through your mind throughout the day. It’s the way you talk to yourself about everything you experience. This inner voice can be encouraging and supportive or critical and negative. Your self-talk shapes your thoughts, emotions, and ultimately your actions.
Different Types of Self-Talk: Positive vs. Negative
1. Positive Self-Talk
- Encouraging and Uplifting: This type of self-talk involves speaking to yourself in a kind and supportive manner. It includes affirmations and optimistic thoughts that boost your confidence and motivation.
- Example: “I can handle this challenge. I have the skills and determination to succeed.”
2. Negative Self-Talk
- Critical and Demoralizing: Negative self-talk is when you criticize yourself or expect the worst. It often involves doubts and fears that undermine your confidence and can lead to anxiety or depression.
- Example: “Everything is going against me. I’m never going to get this right. Why always me? ”
Characteristics of Effective Self-Talk
Specificity: Being Clear and Detailed in Your Self-Talk
Effective self-talk is specific and detailed, which makes it more actionable and impactful. Vague affirmations like “I want to do well” lack the clarity needed to direct your actions and mindset. Instead, specific self-talk provides clear guidance and goals.
Example: Instead of saying, “I want to be successful,” say, “I am improving my skills by practicing for 30 minutes every day, and I can see my progress.”
Positivity: Framing Thoughts in a Constructive and Optimistic Manner
Positive self-talk focuses on what you can do rather than what you can’t. It frames thoughts in a constructive, optimistic manner, which helps to build confidence and resilience. Negative self-talk, on the other hand, can lead to self-doubt and decreased motivation.
Example: Replace “I’m terrible at this” with “I’m learning and getting better every day.”
Present Tense: Speaking to Yourself as If the Desired Outcome Is Already Happening
Using the present tense in self-talk reinforces the belief that change and success are happening now, not in some distant future. This approach makes your goals feel more attainable and real, increasing your motivation and focus.
Example: Instead of saying, “I will be confident one day,” say, “I am confident and capable right now.”
Personalization: Tailoring Self-Talk to Your Unique Goals and Circumstances
Effective self-talk is personalized to fit your unique goals, challenges, and circumstances. Generic affirmations might not resonate with your specific situation, but personalized self-talk speaks directly to your needs and experiences, making it more powerful and relevant.
Example: If you’re preparing for a job interview, instead of a generic statement like “I am successful,” you might say, “I am prepared and confident, and I can effectively communicate my skills and experiences during this interview.”
By incorporating these characteristics into your self-talk, you can make your internal dialogue more effective in driving positive change and achieving your goals. Specificity, positivity, present-tense framing, and personalization work together to create a powerful tool that guides your actions and shapes your reality.

Step-by-Step Guide to Practicing Positive Self-Talk
- Identify Negative Self-Talk Patterns: Pay attention to your inner dialogue throughout the day. Notice when you engage in self-criticism or doubt. Identify specific negative thoughts or phrases that commonly arise.
- Challenge Negative Thoughts: When you catch yourself thinking negatively, challenge those thoughts. Ask yourself if they are based on facts or irrational fears. Challenge the validity of negative beliefs and replace them with more realistic and positive alternatives.
- Create Affirmations: Write down positive affirmations that counteract your negative self-talk. Make sure your affirmations are specific, positive, and personalized to your goals and circumstances. Choose statements that resonate with you and inspire confidence.
- Repeat Affirmations Daily: Practice repeating your affirmations daily, preferably in front of a mirror. Say them aloud with conviction and sincerity. Repetition helps reinforce positive beliefs and rewires your brain to think more optimistically.
- Visualize Success: Combine your affirmations with visualization techniques. Close your eyes and imagine yourself achieving your goals or overcoming challenges. Visualize the emotions, sensations, and details of success as vividly as possible.
- Practice Gratitude: Cultivate a mindset of gratitude by focusing on the positive aspects of your life. Each day, take a few moments to reflect on what you’re thankful for. Express gratitude for your strengths, accomplishments, and the support of others.
- Surround Yourself with Positivity: Surround yourself with positive influences, whether it’s supportive friends and family, uplifting books and music, or inspirational quotes and affirmations. Minimize exposure to negativity, such as negative news or toxic relationships.
- Celebrate Small Wins: Acknowledge and celebrate your achievements, no matter how small. Recognize your progress and efforts, and give yourself credit for taking positive steps forward. Celebrating small wins boosts confidence and motivation.
- Practice Self-Compassion: Be kind to yourself, especially during setbacks or challenges. Treat yourself with the same compassion and understanding you would offer to a friend. Practice self-care activities that nourish your mind, body, and soul.
- Stay Consistent: Positive self-talk is a habit that takes time and effort to develop. Stay committed to practicing these techniques consistently, even when faced with obstacles or setbacks. Be patient with yourself and trust in the power of positivity to transform your mindset and life.
Key Takeaways:
- Your self-talk influences every aspect of your life, from relationships to career success.
- Specific, positive, and present-tense self-talk rewires your brain for success.
- Positive self-talk reduces stress, enhances resilience, and boosts confidence.
- Studies consistently show a correlation between positive self-talk and improved performance.
- Cultivating self-compassion and gratitude enhances the effectiveness of your self-talk practice.
- Consistency is key; commit to daily practice to reap the full benefits of positive self-talk.
Ready to transform your life through the power of positive self-talk? Follow our blog for actionable insights, practical tips, and real-life success stories. Join our community of like-minded individuals on the journey to greater happiness, fulfillment, and success. Subscribe now and start your journey toward a more empowered and confident you.

One reply on “If you talk to yourself like this you’ll also get EVERYTHING you want”
[…] Think of journaling as having a conversation with yourself. Ask questions, then answer them as if you’re talking to a friend. For example: “Why am I feeling so anxious today?” Follow it up with, “Because I’m worried about my job.” This technique is incredibly powerful for catharsis and problem-solving. By talking to yourself on paper, you can identify root causes, explore emotions, and brainstorm solutions. It’s a constructive and healing way to process hard times while uncovering your inner wisdom. Learn If you talk to yourself like this you’ll also get EVERYTHING you want […]